Mothers. All knowing bestowers of wisdom. As children we expect them to be the font of all knowledge. How glad I am that unlike previous generations I have the Internet at my disposal. For eventually The Master will get old enough to ask curly questions like “why is the sky blue?“, “why do cats purr?” and “what kind of power does a TARDIS run on?” and I will either have to make stuff up (an option that is not without its appeal) or consult the actual font of all knowledge… Wikipedia.
But eventually we begin to doubt our mothers and their maternal wisdom. We allow the evidence of our own experience to influence us. We sit too close to the television and yet our eyes retain their normal shape. The wind changes and our faces don’t stay that way. Sooner or later we realise that, though she can usually find that thing that we’ve been looking for, our mothers don’t, in fact, have all the answers. And actually, some of that stuff sounds made up.
Thus it was once I reached that Age of Skepticism. I openly scoffed at my mother and her insistence that drinking a hot cup of coffee on a hot day was an effective way of staying cool. Yeah, right, Mum. That sounds legit. Tell me again about how eating my crusts will make my hair go curly. What. Ever.
And here’s where I eat crow, dear readers. Because it does eventuate, that um, drinking a hot drink on a hot day does actually cool you down. Apparently it’s all to do with producing more sweat, which we all know is one of the body’s nifty tricks for cooling itself.
So this is awkward.
In my defense, this piece of information is totally counter intuitive. It’s like saying that if you want to be taller you should try slouching or that drinking wine really does make you clever, funny, and an excellent dancer. But then the world is full of counter intuitive stuff that is genuinely true, like the fact that the odds of the Lotto numbers on Saturday night being 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 aren’t any higher than them being a different set of numbers of a superficially more random pattern. Or the fact that Shia LaBeouf is considered leading man material in Hollywood movies. It’s nuts…and yet it’s undeniably true.
And it’s not only hot tea that has this effect. According to the article, spicy foods are also a good way of stimulating extra sweat and therefore cooling off. So all those times my “medium” chicken jalfrezi was more “medium-hot” and I wondered how on earth people in the subcontinent coped with these dishes in a tropical climate I was missing the key ingredient, namely perspiration. This also explains how the Victorians in all their ridiculous clothes managed to spend any time there without passing out constantly. Tea. All the time. Apparently there really aren’t any problems that can’t be fixed by a nice cuppa.
But I don’t know, maybe this marks me out as a bit prissy, but I just don’t want my food to make me sweaty. It smacks of impertinence.
With regards to beating the summer heat I think I may just go with my mother’s other trusty standby which is a nice cold flannel on the forehead or back of the neck.
What motherly advice did you blatantly ignore growing up, only to discover there might be a nugget of truth to it, later in life? Alternately what’s the best piece of nonsense your mum ever told you (excepting God and Santa which we’ve already covered)?
Originally published on Stuff, 15/01/2015
Image Source: Three girls having tea in a garden, Kate Greenaway (copyright free image via Auckland City Art Gallery)